Censored! Check Out the Gun Meme That Got Me Perma-Banned from Twitter/X

Uh-oh, someone’s TRIGGERED.

I have the most dangerous pants in the Second Amendment sphere, and I can prove it!

Remember when Elon Musk bought Twitter and said that he was putting an end to the rampant censorship on that platform? How, as long as you weren’t breaking any laws or specifically harassing people, your voice would be respected? Well, apparently that doesn’t apply to gun memes. If someone, somewhere is offended by your gun meme … or if they’re offended on someone else’s behalf by the gun meme … well, the ol’ Twitter Ban-Hammer is still very much in play.

*record scratch* How did we get here, folks?

Well, it was a normal night at the XDMAN household. The mistress in her kerchief and I in my cap were settling down for a long summer’s nap. When, what does my wandering mind design? Two photos, one Photoshop, and a question for our time. Suddenly, I was as full of ideas as I was of late-night Chips Ahoy (why are they so delicious at 11 p.m.?). I had a question, a very important one. One that could only be addressed by meme, and only answered by likes and re-Xeets.

So I made my meme, giggled, and posted it. Would you like to see the meme that Twitter found far too dangerous for your tender eyes? Gird yourselves, my dear readers, and get ready to be shocked and challenged by my “harmful content.” I only hope you’ve got the fortitude to survive:

Just remember, when you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

Everybody okay? Yes? Good, because apparently the above meme had at least one Karen type LiTerAllY ShAAkinG rIGHt NoW. That’s because, a few minutes after I posted my meme, I received the following:

I guess somebody hates hamburgers and hot dogs.

I just wanted to know whether or not my Springfield Saint’s tailor has it dressing to the left, the right, or the center. I’m inviting it to the cookout and I just need to know what kind of buns it would rather nestle between when it’s relaxed and hanging out. But it seems I offended someone.

Of course, that someone couldn’t possibly just roll their eyes and keep scrolling like a person who lives under the First Amendment and understands that sometimes, we will see and hear things we don’t like. Like, I never wanted to see Lena Dunham’s bare chest but one day I flipped past HBO at the wrong time and … there they were … the Red Robin Special … two all-beef patties topped with runny fried eggs. In that moment, I realized two things: One, that there ARE some boobs that I DON’T want to see; and two, that I have the power to not see them by simply closing my eyes or changing the channel.

If only I had posted something more in line with the accepted “community standards” of Twitter/X! Something like THIS. Or THIS.

It’s true that I made a mistake. I should have just immediately deleted the meme and copied one of the ones lionizing that moron who shot a United Healthcare CEO in the back. But instead, I just waited for my suspension to end because (to my tremendous shame) I have other things to do with my very limited free time. Clearly, someone would see that my meme was a joke and that there was no threat of violence implied. Well.

Have a little irony. It’s good for your blood.

As you can see, Elon Musk himself commented about social media censorship right at the same time that I was permanently banned from Twitter/X. Yes, of course I’m appealing, but I’m not optimistic about my chances. Some humorless vegan (but I repeat myself) was briefly offended by a Photoshopped picture of two guns wearing pants, and that means I need to be deplatformed.

So, here’s an appeal to my readers! Please follow me on Facebook at www.facebook.com/therealxdman/, on YouTube at @theRealXDMan, and on Instagram at therealxdman. But before you go, could you please … please, I beg you … go to the comments and tell me. Hamburger or hotdog style?