Why OH WHY Won’t Germany Pass Common-Sense Car Control?!?

As long as you aren’t sheltering an Audi under your floorboards, you have nothing to fear.

IF JUST ONE LIFE IS SAVED, IT’LL BE WORTH IT!

Let’s face it, German car culture is absolutely out of control. It has a serious body count, and that body count just went up. The recent mass murder attempt in a German public market proves it, and we’re so sick and tired of having to document these automotive slayings. Nobody’s sure why the Huns love internal combustion engines so much, but the Deutsch obsession with automobiles is just shameful. Mercedes-Benz, BMW, Maybach … if it guzzles gas and goes much too fast, it’s from Germany. The Germans have structured their entire infrastructure around these noisy, one-ton behemoths in the most shocking of ways.

For example, did you know that the Autobahn–Germany’s largest freeway–has no speed limit in some areas? That’s right: Germans can and do push their cars up over 65 miles per hour, which as we all know is the fastest that any civilian would ever need to go for any reason. In fact, most German cars can actually go just as fast as police cars … that’s just insane! It’s long past time to talk about some common-sense car control.

First of all, nobody needs more than one exhaust pipe. Have you seen the back ends of some of these so-called “performance cars”? It’s insane that civilians can access automobiles with multiple exhaust pipes, and they should be banned immediately. What’s that you say? The Magdeburg attack wouldn’t have been better or worse regardless of the number of exhaust pipes? You’re in the pocket of Big Exhaust, aren’t you?

If Germans want to drive cars everywhere, all the time, as fast as possible, they ought to join the police. The police are the only ones with the skills and knowledge necessary to keep that Beemer between the ditches in fourth gear. Speaking of fourth gear, there’s no reason why any automotive needs to go that fast. Studies have repeatedly proven that people are most competent at about 35 miles per hour. (No, I will not link any of the studies. Facts are for fascists.) So why not just put a governor on the engines of all new cars that restricts them to that speed?

Of course, that would leave lots of “legacy” autos out there without governors and wearing multiple tailpipes, so there would need to be a big governmental “buyback” for those outdated, dangerous, ungoverned cars. Now we know that sometimes German citizens get silly ideas about hiding things from their government. Therefore, the German police–maybe the military, too–should go door-to-door, checking attics and basements for those who dare to hide their horsepower.

It’s an idea whose time has come. Mr. and Mrs. Deutschland, turn ’em all in!

For the rest of the story, we’re turning it over to the Citizens Committee for the Right to Keep and Bear Arms (CCRKBA).

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The terror attack in a Magdeburg, Germany public market killing five people and injuring 200 more proved once again that restrictive gun control hardly guarantees public safety against determined acts of murder and mayhem anywhere in the world, the Citizens Committee for the Right to Keep and Bear Arms said.

CCRKBA Chairman Alan Gottlieb said the holiday season attack was reminiscent of the murderous outrage in July 2016 against people celebrating Bastille Day in Nice, France. There, 86 people were killed and many more injured by a madman driving a stolen freight truck through a crowd. Add to that the 2021 rampage in Waukesha, Wisconsin when a deranged career criminal drove an SUV into a crowd watching a Christmas parade, killing six people and injuring 62 others, he recalled.

“Time and again we have warned that restricting the rights of law-abiding citizens is a bogus solution to violent crime, whether on a mass scale or an individual act,” Gottlieb observed. “Disarming honest, peaceable people only creates the dangerous illusion that something has been done to protect the public, and the gun prohibition lobby knows it. Their interest has never been reducing crime, but only discouraging and reducing private gun ownership.

“In recent days,” he continued, “we’ve also seen news reports about fatal stabbings in Azusa, California, Miami, Florida and Seattle, Washington. A few days ago, a woman in New Jersey was allegedly bludgeoned to death. In Philadelphia, a woman was strangled over the weekend. A woman on a New York subway was set on fire and burned to death, allegedly by an illegal alien who was once deported during the Trump administration.

“I call attention to these crimes,” Gottlieb explained, “because they illustrate how individuals are responsible for criminal violence, not the tool they use. Whether people use guns, knives, blunt objects, vehicles, cigarette lighters or bare hands, it is the perpetrator who is ultimately responsible for their evil acts, and shifting blame to the weapon neither solves the problem nor prevents another, similar crime from happening an hour, day or month later. We don’t try to restrict ownership of motor vehicles, knives, hammers, baseball bats, lighters or any other object which can be used as a weapon. Only firearms, which are constitutionally protected.

“Restricting the right to keep and bear arms, which is protected by the federal and state constitutions is a flimsy sham that is wearing thinner by the day,” he concluded, “and incidents like those in Magdeburg, Waukesha, Nice, Miami, Philadelphia, New York and Seattle only prove that point.”